IT'S THE NEWS.

2017-10-17 13:20:11 by DanielTheManiel

(DO DA DO DAAAAAA)

Welcome to THE NEWS!

I'm your host Dan The Man With No Plan, Stan.

Today's first story is that we apparently have no female reporters.

"How did this happen?" - Barry

"What?" - Doug

"Excuse me?" - Terry

"Ummm, What?" - Greg

"WOWZERS" - Chuck

To solve this we have recruited a new field reporter, Prisilla.

"Thank you new guy, I'm currently in front of this big building where somebody dieded."

Well thank you Pricisialla.

"It's Prisilla."

Yes thank you Pieces.

Our next story is about a large animal that is in the ocean, It was first sighted by some locals off the coast of Africa.

It has been seen by coast guards all over the world.

We have invited biologist George Fishman to tell us about this strange creature.

"Umm, Are you high? Have you never heard  of a sperm whale?"

We're talking about this large fish, not sperm.

"No, fuck this. Goodbye"

Goodbye fish man.

And now, for the FORECAST, Bad Company Chuck!

"WOWZERS, I HAVE THE WEATHER AND IT'S SUNNY AND RAINY ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT!"

Thank you Chuck.

That was THE NEWS, Thank you for watching and remember to only eat meat!


Comments

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DanielTheManielDanielTheManiel

2017-10-17 13:23:15

NEWSING NEWS NEWS NEWS


DanielTheManielDanielTheManiel

2017-10-17 13:23:40

METAL GEAR NEWSING: RENEWSANCE.


AkillezAkillez

2017-10-17 15:56:15

Interesting news, perhaps later we can investigate why the chicken crossed the road.

DanielTheManiel responds:

THE NEWS is not a joke sir.


BraydogNGBraydogNG

2017-10-17 17:08:08

"Yes, Thank you pieces" I lost it right there.

Also, no trump. Fake news. 0/10 rotten ign's

DanielTheManiel responds:

I have told you before sir that we do not have musical reporter to report on trumpets, Please stop this nonsense.


BraydogNGBraydogNG

2017-10-17 18:02:17

Be on the lookout for networks such as the one you already have.

Hehe
Hehehe
HehehehahahHAHAHAHAHAHA

hehe

blablablablablabladanewssquadblablabla

DanielTheManiel responds:

You and your network will die a sad and mean death because of this, cease and desist now or pay sir.


OneThousandMeepsOneThousandMeeps

2017-10-19 18:04:58

What a wonderful addition of THE NEWS! May I ask how to donate?

DanielTheManiel responds:

Just spread the word! THE NEWS needs fans more than money.